I knew a lady in Tennessee several years ago who was like the character named Rachel Lynde in the Anne of Green Gables/Anne of Avonlea movies. Rachel Lynde beamed with pride that "she was known around these parts as a woman who speaks her mind." (A person like that is usually known!) The woman in Tennessee was just the same. She told me early on in our church relationship (I was a youth pastor and she an elderly woman in the church) that I should not worry about what she said because she was a straight talker who "likes to tell it like it is" or some other synonym for opinionated venting; verbal voiding.
Christians, of which I am one, are fond of "speaking the truth in love." Sometimes, however, we use that as code for the old "bless and slam" routine. Back in Texas, the way it works is you say, "Bless his [or her]heart . . ." and then slam the person any way you want to. The "bless his [or her] heart . . ." qualifier allows you to go on record as "loving" the person you are about to slam, but declares that what you are about to say is the truth and needs to be said, though at the expense of the person so dearly loved.
Jesus said, ". . . wisdom is proved right by all her children (Luke 7:35)." The same could be said about love. It is easy for us to say, "I love you." It is interesting when you stumble upon a person who still thinks that if you say magic words like "I love you," they cancel out all bad behavior and the recipient of the words is obligated to accept them without question.
But just saying the words doesn't make it so. When you truly love a person it will guide your actions where that person is concerned. That's why Paul can say that love is the fulfillment of the Law: "Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law(Romans 13:10)."
If someone really loves me--the relationship is real, trustworthy, tried and true--that person can say things to me that may cause pain, but I can recover and will benefit from them because they flow out of genuine love. The pain felt will be due to the reality of the words said, not the shock at being betrayed or something worse.
So, the question is, this person that you are going to confront: do you genuinely love them? Have you shown that in real deeds? If so, pray and then let love dictate your words. If not, brace yourself Effie! It's going to get ugly--Grandma-gittin'-out-the-tub ugly! (Sorry Grandma!)